Mommy and Daughter

I asked Eric the other day if he has ever felt like there was something different between the connection he has with Renn than Avery? The answer is "yes" for me. Not is a bad way... it just is. When I found out I was pregnant I KNEW she was a girl and that made me nervous. I felt like I had the boy thing down. Could I really raise a girl? Was I going to be good enough at the fashion side of it? Was it just going to be too much hoopla that I feel like comes with girls? Of course, you figure it out and you set your own path as a parent but they were all fears/concerns. Once she arrived. I felt the weight of her being female and knowing in my heart what comes, how life goes, the up and downs, the emotions and needs. It's a lot and I pray A LOT for her little life. May she be confident, bold, brave, healthy, fearless, creative, a lover of Christ and allow Him to love her back as she is. May she know where her worth and value comes from. May she be adventurous, truth telling, loving, kind, have a heart that feels and is moved by others. May she trust me when the going gets tough and know that without a doubt I will understand, support, push, and affirm. I love her. It hurts the back of my throat with the tears I hold back when I think about loving her. 

Little Avery, know that I love you with a love that I never knew could exist and I look forward to knowing you and living life along side you. 

Read more...

Baby's First Christmas

I am thankful to have it be Avery's 1st Christmas! Simply because it means we get closer and closer to her 2nd and 3rd Christmas which she will enjoy that much more. She had the most fun actually playing with her brother's toy (I am guessing this will be the story of her life) then the few things she got. She had her first Cranberry bread (a family tradition) and while she liked the tree and the lights she was not attracted to pulling on it by any means. This gives me hope that in the next couple of years we can put ornaments back on our main tree. She slept through Christmas lunch which gets a "woot! woot!" from me. As for gifts from us she got her cute red piano and a pink walker toy. I really think it is the only pink toy in the house. She got her first pair of pearl earrings from Papa T's recent visit to Japan. And probably the most practical and will be the most used gift was a new security blankee so I am not having to cart the one we had back and forth from school to home everyday. One of the more exciting things for her during the day was the accomplishment of her first steps. We knew it was coming and sure enough they arrived with Santa. My parents got to watch and I am always thankful to witness the 1st instead of them happening at school. It is amazing to think last Christmas I was preggers with her and now here she is. Living, growing and learning. What a tremendous gift she is. 

Read more...

thumb sucker

She sucks her thumb. I knew she would from the moment she arrived. You hand the child her blanket and in goes the thumb. Honestly, if she even touches anything soft including if you are wearing a soft sweater in goes the thumb. It fascinates me. I was not a thumb sucker, paci user or had any sort of attachment to a blanket. So I am intrigued. Will she just one day give it up? Will it always provide her comfort? Will I have to paint her nails with yucky tasting stuff to break her of the habit? I try not to "worry" about it right now and just thankful that she has a means of self soothing. When I hand her the blanket, her thumb goes in and she lays back in my arms I get to hold on just a bit longer to the baby still in her and that I enjoy. 

Read more...